Happy New Year!!

Well, it’s here, 2023. It’s hard to believe that another year is over and we’re already into the next one. 

I hope you all had a lovely Christmas and New Year and weren’t too bogged down with this nasty cold / flu bug which seems to be everywhere. My eldest son was the first to by laid low, then my husband got it just before Christmas and is still coughing and spluttering. My youngest son caught it from him and has been suffering quite badly with it. I, however, have managed to escape it so far. There, I’ve just jinxed myself, I’ll probably catch it now I’m due back at work.

 

Christmas – well it takes so much preparation and then it’s over in a flash. I hope you all had a lovely Christmas, we did. We spent it with my husband’s family – twenty of us. We all chipped in with the cooking but hat’s off to my brother-in-law and sister-in-law for hosting it all. We had a great time but I was glad we had nothing planned for Boxing Day so we could all recover. There was another party on the Tuesday for a belated 21^st. And then my mum came to stay with us for a few days. It was lovely to spend some proper time with her, especially at this time of year.

 

Amidst all the celebrations, there is also a sadness to this time of year for me. Five years ago, just before Christmas my mother-in-law passed away. The following day, whilst my mum was undergoing knee replacement surgery, my dad was diagnosed with terminal cancer and passed away ten days later on 30^th January. This is him on my wedding day.

 

 

I still miss him so much and am sad that he’s not here to see what lovely young people all his grandchildren have become. I try to look on the positive side though, that he is not really lost to us, but is forever with us in our hearts. It makes me cherish my mum even more though, and I am eternally grateful that she is still very much in our lives.

 

It’s not been a great year for a lot of people, and I’ve had some incredible stressful periods throughout the months, but I have ended the year feeling positive and particularly motivated for my writing in the year ahead. Life is what you make it after all, and I’m going to do my best to make 2023 a thoroughly productive writing year.

 

Wishing you all the very best for 2023!

 

It's Strictly Time!

I must admit I do enjoy watching Strictly – it’s something to look forward to on the long autumn / winter nights in the run up to Christmas.

I love the learning curve that the celebrities go on in their quest to learn to dance.

 

It’s a more intense version of the path to becoming a writer, although most of us writers learn our craft on the side-lines rather than in the glare of the public eye. 

 

The other similarity to writing is that the dancers have to learn to listen to the feedback of the judges in order to progress.

 

One of the things I like about Strictly, compared with other similar programmes, is that I feel the judges are not being intentionally nasty in their feedback, they have a genuine desire to show the dancers how they can improve, to progress through to the next stage. But sometimes the way feedback is received is down to the delivery.

 

Craig is viewed as the nasty judge because he always marks lower than the other judges and because he is super critical. But I think part of the audience’s reaction to him is because he always starts off with the bad points before praising anything that is good. I received advice a long time ago that feedback should be like a sandwich: start with something good, put the meaty feedback in the middle and then finish on something good too. I have been part of several readers groups and given feedback to other writers and the process has helped me to develop my own writing as it helps me to focus on both what does and doesn’t work. It would never be my wish to demoralise any writer, but I also think there’s no point in simply praising what is good and ignoring what can be improved upon. And so the sandwich method has enabled me to deliver what I will always hope to be constructive criticism. 

 

It can be crushing to receive harsh feedback, especially when you have put your heart and soul into something. As writers, we know how demoralising that can be, but we also know that constructive criticism is what makes us better writers. 

 

Reading feedback for the first time can be daunting, but from personal experience I find that if I put it aside for a few days, when I come to re-read it, I can connect with it more rationally. I’ve always found that constructive criticism often rings true and highlights issues that I have known were there but which I haven’t been able to fully acknowledge.

 

Similarly, if deep down the feedback doesn’t sit right with you, then you can make your own decision to disregard it. If you are a true writer, you will think carefully about the feedback you receive and take on board the parts of it that you know will help you develop as a writer and produce an improved piece of work.

 

So as we are coming towards the end of Strictly for another year, we can sit back, relax and enjoy watching how much the dancers have improved over the series.

And when its finished, well, then it will be Christmas. 

A Momentous Day

Yesterday was a momentous day as the first COVID vaccines were administered to the elderly of our nation. Once more we need to be thankful for our NHS service which has the capacity not only to deliver these vaccines but also to do so without charge. We have a lot to be thankful for, not least that thanks to research, it has been developed in the first place. At last there looks like might be an end to the uncertainty and never ending fear of COVID even if it’s not until well into next year. 

Across the world people are set to experience one of the loneliest Christmases in living memory. My heart goes out to anyone who lives alone and I am extremely grateful for the fact that my own widowed mother currently lives with my youngest brother so even if we can’t go and see her she will not be alone.

 

I currently live with my husband and two sons so I won’t be alone this Christmas either but celebration with the wider family is definitely looking doubtful at the moment. 

 

I’m very behind on my Christmas preparations this year and am struggling to develop any enthusiasm for the festivities. I’m not particularly fond of online shopping for presents. Unless it’s something specific, I’d rather see before I buy when it comes to presents for other people and prefer the inspiration of an actual shop rather than searching through random websites.

 

So I delayed the majority of my Christmas shopping until after this second lockdown. And then last weekend disaster struck. Towards the end of last week my husband’s foot swelled up for no apparent reason. On Saturday I took him to A&E where he spent most of the day being tested for a blood clot because he has a heart condition. The result was that they thought it was an infection and he was sent home with antibiotics, and because he was told not to put any weight on his foot for at least a week, a Zimmer frame. Four days later and things haven’t improved much and due to his mobility he can’t do very much for himself. He doesn’t feel ill in himself, which is a good thing, but he’s getting very bored and frustrated as he’s used to being active and it’s hard to see him so incapacitated. 

 

As if that wasn’t enough, on Monday my youngest son was sent home from school as he had been in contact with someone who had tested positive for COVID and now has to self-isolate for the next fourteen days. He’s not worried for himself but for me and his dad as we are both in a vulnerable category. So far he has no symptoms but if he does test positive later this week we’re all going to be in isolation over

Christmas. Perhaps this is a first world problem but if I don’t get my finger out and soon, if we do have to go into isolation then Christmas won’t be delivered and as a woman I will feel like I have failed my family. 

 

Fingers crossed he doesn’t develop any symptoms and that we don’t either otherwise it’s going to be a very zoom Christmas. At least we have the internet and a lot to be thankful for. 

 

Hope you all stay happy and healthy during the “festive” period!

Happy In Between Christmas and New Year

Okay, so this isn't exactly a Christmasy image, but we are betwixt and between now, and one of the over-riding images of Christmas this year for me was settling down on Christmas Eve with my boys and watching the Snow Chic documentary.  It was a fascinating insight into the life of penguins without being too highbrow.  My youngest son adores penguins, so this made it even more enjoyable.

The other image of Christmas for me was my 14 year old son sitting on the end of my bed on Christmas morning, opening the presents from his stocking.  My mind kept floating back to when they were little and although he showed as much enthusiasm as in years gone by, there was rather a lot less room left in the bed for us.  Its nice that he still has that youthful exuberance though, I wonder if it will still be there next year, or whether I will have to drag him out of bed!

I hope you have all had a lovely Christmas and have survived the food, the drink, the excess and the water!  My heart goes out to all those people who have been flooded out of their homes this year, I can only imagine what that must feel like.

It's been a difficult year for our family this year and perhaps because of that I was counting my blessings this Christmas.  I've blogged about my difficulties at work, but now I'm in a new job and am enjoying it so much more - what a difference nice people make - although it's been a challenge to get my head around it all, which has left very little time for writing.  Towards the end of this year too, I have also encountered some family problems which, although not resolved, I feel at least we are coming to terms with now.

My main thought just before Christmas was that I would be glad to see the back of this year,  but then came a little ray of sunshine in the form of editor, Alison Cook, from The People's Friend.  Alison is such a lovely person, even when she's rejecting my stories, but this wasn't a rejection but an acceptance!

My story had been with them with September which proves that you should never give up hope, and it's just about the only story I have out for submission at the moment, so you can imagine my delight.  It gave me that extra boost I needed to believe in my writing and really made my Christmas.

I had decided that I wasn't going to make any New Year resolutions this year but this has made me determined to put more effort into my writing, and get more stories written and out there - after all you've got to be in it to win it.  

I'm getting myself organised in the lull between Christmas and New Year, and now that I'm more settled in my job, I hope that I can get into a better writing routine on the days when I'm not in work, and have a bit more enthusiasm to continue writing after work on the days that I am.

I'm also aiming to be a better blogger this year - but I say that every year!

Happy belated Christmas everyone.

Happy New Year!

Wishing everyone who is reading this a very happy New Year.

December for me is always a bit of right-off writing-wise as I struggle to prepare for Christmas and juggle everything else.  Each year I promise I won’t let myself be distracted from writing but I always am and this year was no exception.

Christmas Day passed by in such a rush I wondered, as usual, what all the effort was for and then on Boxing Day I came down with a cold/flu bug which is going around and which made me feel rubbish.

I did manage to see some family but not all although I recovered in time for New Year’s Eve.

I’m feeling very positive about 2015.  Last year, for many of my friends, 2014 was a horrible year which they were glad to see the back of.  It certainly had its down moments for me, but it was a bit of a non-descript year which seemed to slip through my fingers. I don’t feel I achieved anything I set out to at the beginning of the year.

That’s why I want this year to be different.  I have so many plans which is part of my problem, I tend to flit from one thing to another and it takes ages to get anything done.  This year I’m going to set myself a project to focus on each month, so that the temptation to get distracted is reduced (fingers’ crossed).

For January the project is a novel which is in its fifth draft.  It’s nearly ready to be sent out but not quite and so I’ve determined by the end of January it will be ready.  I’ve been working on some of the edits from my sickbed and so already have a momentum going which I hope to keep to throughout the month.

Instead of setting specific resolutions this year I only have one – and that is to dedicate more time to things I want to do not things I feel I need to do.  That’s my incentive to get writing more, to make this year count.

What do you hope to achieve in 2015?

Christmas Is Coming ......

And I am getting fat.  (I keep meaning to go on a diet but that's another story!)

Every year, I try to stay in denial about Christmas for as long as I possibly can, but it appears that I can deny it no longer.

It might be something to do with the fact that Christmas cards have been in the shops since August, or that the supermarket over the top adverts are gracing our TV's at every opportunity, or even the school newsletters which are full of requests for money and Christmas gifts.

But mostly its due to my husband who has been muttering all week that we need to start doing something about Christmas.

I'm not sure where the "we" comes in, I think loosely translated it means me because I'm usually the one who ends up doing 95% of the preparation. My husband is one of six and I am one of three, and although we dont buy for the adults, we do buy for the children, some of whom have children of their own. 

It's not that I mind, just that its such a mamoth task, the whole thing daunts me and I my instinct is to bury my head in the sand until such a time that I have to lift it out again.

That time has come.  Today I bought my first two presents and now the need to get organised has become insistent.

I feel a list coming on, I simply can't do it all without it!

Ba Humbug!

 

When You Can Deny It No Longer

Christmas is coming. It's a fact, and one I try to deny every year. Until it creeps up on me and I realise I need to do something about it. Pronto. Sighs.


I don't want to be bah humbug but I can think of a lot more useful things to be doing with my time than trawling around the shops or the internet, looking for things to buy that I can't actually really afford - especially not this year.

And then just when you think you've got it in the bag you think of someone else you need to buy for.

So every year I put it even thinking about it for as long as possible and then get really annoyed by the smug people who, in mid-November, smile and say,

'Oh Christmas shopping, I've finished mine.

Grinds teeth to a fine powder.

So today I'm going to bite the bullet and get started on my Christmas card list. If I can get all the ones I need to post out of the way, I might feel some small sense of satisfaction.

And then I can get on and do something that I actually want to do.

Where Does The Time Go?

Is it just me or is the Time Elf on the rob again?   I just don’t know what has happened to November – or the rest of the year for that matter.   I’m having a bit of a dilemma because I’m now facing the fact that I can deny the C thing no longer. It’s something to do with school nativities, Christmas fairs, football and cubs’ Christmas parties etc etc. And that’s without the thought of shopping, card writing, and who’s coming to stay for the big day? (Bit of familial negotiation going on there too!)

With two boys who are very active, the only day of the week where I usually don’t have to be the after school taxi service is on a Thursday, but at the moment I have at least two things going on each day. Also the letters and texts from school asking for a donation for this, that and the other is just about driving me insane (as well as very poor).  If you see someone fighting for breath, trying to get out from under a mound of paper – that will be me!

And of course all of this trying to remember what I’m supposed to be doing next, isn’t exactly conducive to writing. My mind is doing an impression of the Easter Bunny. (Yes, that will be here before we know it too. At least it might bring some better weather with it.)

The other day I read an article featuring a mainstream author.  He said that when he’s in the throes of writing a book he writes constantly, blocking out the rest of the world and all the menial stuff it contains.

Now, I don’t mean to be sexist but yes it was a man. How many women writers do you know who could do that? (Sorry guys). At least it’s made my mind up about what I want for Christmas.  I want a wife.

Christmas is Coming!

It’s true.  The supermarkets are full of advent calendars and other Christmas goodies.

I nearly fell over when I saw them at the weekend.   I haven’t even fully recovered from the summer holidays yet.   Halloween seems ages away and yet it’s Christmas.

I thought that rows of school uniforms and Back to School signs in June long before the kids had even broken up from school was bad enough but this is a step too far.  I was glad though that they were playing Christmas music in store, that would have finished me off completely.

No wonder time seems to be passing even more quickly with each year.  It’s because we’re having Christmas in September!  Go away, I’m not ready yet!

All Over!

It’s incredible isn’t it? We spend months preparing for Christmas and then its all over in a flash. Every year I sit down to Christmas dinner and wonder what all the fuss was about.

But I’m not being Ba Humbug anymore. Christmas is such hard work but I do love the giving of presents. Seeing the boys' faces light up as they open their presents. And sometimes the smallest of things bring the biggest delights - like the packs of Go Go’s - small plastic toys which are collectables and cost about a pound - which were the winning gifts this year.

 

I did have a lucky escape though. On the afternoon of Christmas Eve I put all the boys’ presents in the cupboard under the boiler in our spare bedroom. Normally I keep them in the wardrobe but I don’t like filling the sacks from there in case the rustling wakes them up. All was fine on Christmas Eve but overnight the boiler developed a leak and flooded the cupboard beneath. If it had happened a few hours earlier - well I don’t like to think!

 

We had a quiet Christmas Day, just the four of us. We went to church in the morning, the boys were shepherds in the nativity and it was lovely to sing all the carols. It was nice to take a few moments to remember the real meaning of Christmas which often gets lost amongst all the commercialism. Then we went for a drink in our local and met up with friends before dinner and an evening in front of the Christmas tele.

 

Boxing Day wasn’t quite so relaxing as we invited both families round. At one point the house was filled with twenty five people including eight children, so it was a little chaotic at times but nice to see everyone together.

 

Now its over and this is the time of year I really look forward to. No work, no school and once all the family commitments are fulfilled, I can slob out in my PJ’s until lunchtime, reading, writing and just doing exactly what I want.

 

What’s that darling? You want to play on the Wii? No problem!

Hope you all had a very Merry Christmas too!

Anyone For Some Festive Spirit?

So are we feeling festive?   Er I don’t think so.

As my boys reminded me its only eight more sleeps until Christmas.

OH NO!  How did that happen?

It’s the same every year.  Despite that fact that I know Christmas is looming it always sneeks up on me, taps on my shoulder and shouts “Boo!”  I suppose it doesn’t help that I always go into denial until it’s too late to do anything other than panic.

But I did try and get organised this year.  I did! Honest!

I have a sister-in-law who goes out and does her shopping in one hit at the beginning of November. I don’t know how she does it. In November I don’t even know what to buy and I can’t remember everyone I need to buy for either as my memory is like a sieve and after a few hours of Christmas shopping I loose the will to live.  So by trying to start early all I’ve done is prolong the agony.

We’ve been having some work done on the house too. A few shelves here a few there, a new cupboard in one room, a curtain rail in the other.  Not major work I grant you but very messy!  So extra time cleaning up. And then my husband decided that he was going to redecorate my eldest’s bedroom on Monday.  Now, as he is a painter and decorator by trade, the opportunities to have my own house decorated are few and far between so I had to grab it with both hands.  End result – contents of child’s bedroom piled into the middle of the floor. I didn’t realise just how many toys he has that he never plays with.  It does rather beg the question why does he need any more?  I did intend to do my Domestic Goddess bit and sort it all out but I’m afraid the Clutter Fairy was busy. (Incidentally a neighbour of mine does actually use a clutter fairy but I’m afraid I’d be too embarrassed to show anyone the state of my junk.)  So yesterday I filled up the new shelves and stuffed the rest back under the bed.  I’ll sort it after Christmas – I promise.

And, if that isn’t enough I’ve not been feeling too well this week.  I have an abscess over my tooth which is proving rather painful.  It started earlier in the year and I’ve suffered various painful treatments which I thought I had cured it. But last week it came back so I had to go back to my dentist.  (I’m actually beginning to feel sorry for her.)  Now I’m rattling with antibiotics and am currently alcohol free – so can you see why there’s no festive spirit in my house?  My dentist has referred me to a dental surgeon to have something more painful done in the New Year so at least I’ve got something to look forward to.

Anyway.  Enough of my ba humbug. By the way someone sent me a picture of a grumpy humbug wearing a santa hat this earlier in the week so it’s Official. I did try to upload it onto here but it wouldn't allow me.

I’m going to spend the weekend working like crazy to get everything done and then when I finish work on Wednesday I’m going to spend a few hours snuggled up on the sofa with my boys watching some feel good films to get me feeling festive.

Or in reality – I’ll finish everything at midnight on Christmas Eve, collapse in a heap and then get up at six am to start cooking the turkey!

Anyway, happy Christmas everyone!